Vanity Underwhelmed

"I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?" Thank you teen movies for vastly influencing the thoughts in my brain on a daily basis.

I plopped down into my desk chair and minutes later was in a fit of pure excitement; today Vanity Fair released a preview of the cover to their Hollywood issue, the mecca of magazine issues. The craze faded quickly and led to that quote coming right into my brain, because, yes, I am a little whelmed at this moment.

Normally, at this time of year, I would be counting the days until I could go pick up a copy. Each year is one artistic achievement after another, always chock-full of classy photo spreads. My favorites are many, but a noir murder mystery theme and an homage to every Hitchcock movie will be hard to beat.

To give an even clearer picture on my exuberance towards the subject, allow me to do a little painting; two covers from the past adorn my wall and each year I can't resist using some of the photos  in some crafty way for decoration (definitely a huge addition to class up the walls in my dorm room). Also, being a magazine nut, it is very easy to somehow find yourself with a closet hoard of old magazines. The Hollywood Issue is the only one I allow myself to keep, for my own sanity.

Judging merely by the cover, I hate to say that I'm not really feeling it this year. Definitely bring out Joseph Gordan Levitt or Jesse Eisenberg from the page crease to replace Ryan Reynolds for the full cover shot (or include another girl, maybe, Michelle Williams?), and then I don't really understand a lot of the other people.  

(Jodie Foster a la The Birds, 2008)

Vanity Fair claims that they are going with with who is hot right now, and I just don't see it. Apparently a bunch of people I kind of recognize are really popular right now. That guy from The Hurt Locker, Karen from The Office (now part of Parks & Recreation), and the girl who is wearing a piece of cloth disguised as a dress, she used to make out with Marissa on The OC. Mila Kunis is having the best year out of everybody, move her to the cover.

Last year, the issue was all about fresh actresses and the cover was a simple elegant shot out in a grassy field, where it looked like all the girls had been picnicking. That was very fun, but the only thing I can extend a compliment to this latest issue is using the 1930's as a theme, as to get this edition back into a very elegant affair, full of incredible ensembles.

Other than that though, it's a big miss. We'll just have to wait and see what the rest of the issue brings. Although, I don't think this one will make it to the Hall Of Fame in my room.